Giving, hard or easy?

Many times we are approached and asked for money just because we are North American. Last week we were walking down the street with Pat and Dick (see blog from 3/28) when a lady approached us. She was from a nearby village and told us she needed money for uniforms for her kids to be able to go to school. We asked her a few questions and then took down some information and told her we would see what we could do. She asked us where we lived and we went ahead and told her.

Most of us have learned that people aren't always honest when asking for help and don't always use the money in the way they say they are going to. The Lord has blessed us and we want to bless others, but we also want to be good stewards with what He has entrusted us. So we have learned to do a couple things when wanting to help someone: 1) Verify the need, 2) Provide the need, not just money, and 3) Have the person contribute in some way towards the need.

When she left we all had decided that we wanted to help but were in agreement that we didn't just want to hand her money. I kept thinking about her and how we could verify her need and help her when she showed up at the Home on Sunday asking for us, saying that we had said we would help with uniforms for her kids. We didn't say that exactly, but close enough. So Oralia talked with her and we evaluated the need once again. There were some inconsistencies with her story but we finally decided to help her out. We figured out how she could contribute and then we sent one of the boys from the home with her to the market to buy the agreed upon items. She was thankful, but as her and her daughter left, I sighed and thought, "Why does it have to be so hard to give? I wish we could just trust people and give when the opportunity arises." I do want to add that there are times that when the Spirit is leading we should do just that, but there are other times when we need to check things out.

Now we will fast forward to tonight. We went to church tonight and the sermon was on the rich young man and how he was told to sell everything and give to the poor. Through this sermon we became aware of a dire need in the life of a single mom and her two children. Our paths had crossed with this woman before and she is such a sweet lady. We have been looking and praying for how God would want us to bless others and this time it wasn't hard to figure out. There was an obvious need in the life of a sister in Christ and God wants us to help. This may not only be monetary. Please pray that we can help her find a way to support herself and her children. So sometimes giving is hard and sometimes it is easy, but it is always worth it!

God's ways are higher and bring blessing

In December 2007 we went to the Westside Church Christmas pageant in Omaha. We always tried to go every year if we could. We would usually see lots of people we knew and hadn't seen for awhile, and this year was no exception. We had just recently made the decision to follow the Lord in obedience and prepare to go on the mission field in Guatemala. We were starting to share this plan with others and told them our goal was to leave in a year and a half. We ran into Julie, a long time friend, and shared this with her. Her response was, "Oh, you have to meet someone." She then introduced us to a wonderful lady named Pat who too had fallen in love with the people of Guatemala and she too was making preparations to go serve long term in Guatemala in a year and a half. We chatted and shared stories and then went on our way. We didn't run into Pat again before we left a year and a half later, Aug 2009, and didn't really know what was happening with her.

Well we finished language school and in May 2010 we arrived in Guatemala. In June 2010 we received an email from Pat saying that she now was in Guatemala living about 4 hours from us, but only 1/2 an hour from Guatemala City. Shortly after that we went to visit Pat in Antigua where she is living and serving. We really hit it off and became good friends. We get together when we can, help each other out when we can, and encourage each other. It's especially nice because we have Omaha as a common denominator and end up knowing a lot of the same people. Pat is a retired special education teacher and offers her skills and experience to kids here in Guatemala.

The body of Christ is such a wonderful thing. Through Pat we have met Dick. Dick is retired and living here in Guatemala. Dick has a huge heart for children. He ministers to several boys in his neighborhood who hang out at his house whenever they can and check in with him pretty much every day. He also has a heart for those kids who have disabilities. Besides volunteering at Hermano Pedro, a handicap hospital in Antigua, Dick travels all over Guatemala measuring, adjusting, repairing and delivering wheelchairs.

Pat and Dick came to visit us in San Andres for a few days last week. With them they brought walkers for Chepa and Alicia. Chepa is 23 and has an inoperable brain tumor. She has difficulty keeping her balance to walk and spends some of her time in a wheelchair. Dick adapted a walker especially for Chepa and now she can walk with more confidence without having someone right by her side all the time. She still needs to have a little supervision, but she is enjoying her freedom. As we shared in a previous blog, Alicia has cerebral palsy and is delayed in walking. Dick brought a walker that will help her learn to put more weight on her legs as she learns to walk. Both these apparatus' are a huge blessing!

Dick had lots of help adjusting the walkers.


Chepa getting fitted for her walker and trying it out.

One of our girls here in the home, Leslie, has a learning disability. There is no special education in Guatemala and kids who are struggling just end up repeating their grade. Pat worked with Leslie a little and sat down with her teacher and tutor and gave them some different ideas to do with her. Our goal is to help Leslie pass her grade that she has been in for several years. Pat sharing her expertise with us is a huge help.

Pat reading bedtime stories to Leslie, Marta, and Grisma.

The kids fell in love with both Pat and Dick and I dare to say that the love was mutual. We have a new 5 year old little boy here named Juan who only knows k'iche, no spanish. Dick doesn't know too much Spanish, so the two of them really hit it off and some how communicated with no words. :-)

Dick and Juan hanging out

Juan using reading glasses like Norman and Dick.

We are so blessed to know Pat and Dick and it is so exciting to see how God is using them to minister to His special children here in Guatemala. Thanks Pat and Dick for coming and blessing us greatly! We know two little girls who are smiling bigger because of your efforts!

We took the plunge, now are we going to float or swim?

When we decided to follow God's leading and quit our jobs and trade our house in the country for a smaller one in town and sell our cars and other belongings, and move to Guatemala to serve in a children's home there, we were taking a plunge. We dove right in. As soon as we landed in Costa Rica for language school we began to furiously tread water. There were many days when we barely had our nose above water. But God was faithful and saw us through. I just received an email from a friend from language school and she said, "My heart smiles as I read your stories. To think back on the days in language school and how worried we were about learning the language. Just one of those hurdles in life that seemed to be too high to jump over. For some, He gave grace and allowed them to crawl under the hurdle, hehe " And that's what we did, crawled under and kept treading water even after we arrived in Guatemala.

May 1st we will have been living here in Guatemala for two years. That seems like a long time, but in reality when it comes to adjusting to living in a new culture it is not very long. We are just beginning to feel like we aren't treading water so furiously, like we can relax a little. Maybe even float. That is a good feeling and I realized just recently that I could stay floating and no one would think anything of it.

But God isn't one to let us be less than what He planned and made us to be. So He has been prompting me lately to keep going, keep growing, and take the next step. It is time for me to take another plunge and start reaching out to those outside the home more. To the community. To make friends, have them over for dinner. Be a friend. Now Norman has already been doing that. He is an extrovert and it comes naturally for him to reach out to others. Who cares if they understand his language or not. I love people but I'm a little more timid and introverted. It is harder for me.

I recently shared with a friend that I felt like I should be doing more. Her response was, "You're kidding, right?" I wasn't kidding but I wasn't surprised by her response because I am sure I would have reacted the same way had the roles been reversed. I would be thinking, "You're on the mission field, isn't that enough." I suppose it could be, but this is where I face the decision, am I going to play it safe and just float or am I going to obey and trust God and start to swim? Am I going to keep moving forward and see all the beautiful things He has for me or just float around the same place and see the same old scenery?

And that is my challenge for you as well. What stage are you in right now? Have you taken the plunge in obedience to God or are you still standing safe on solid ground? If you have taken the plunge, are you treading water still or are you in the floating stage? If you're floating, are you going to stay there or are you going to start to swim in obedience and enjoy all the things God has for you.

I hope we all decide to swim and enjoy the abundant life God has for us!

What does it mean to truly trust God?

This question has been rolling around in my mind lately and I decided to put some thoughts on paper. I should warn you that this blog is going to be a little deeper than my usual babbling, but mind you I by no means am saying that I have the answer. In fact, I will tell you right up front, I don’t have the answer.

Plain and simple, life is tough. As most of you know, our 3 year old nephew, Daniel, died tragically 2 years ago. His picture is to the left. We all miss him greatly. I have a friend who is going through her second round of cancer. It is tough. These people love Jesus and trusted Him to protect them and their family. Does that mean God let them down? No, I don’t believe it does, but I do believe it feels that way. This is one area of grieving that I wasn't aware of before, finding it hard to wholy trust God again. But it totally makes sense.

So this brought me to the question, “What does it mean to truly trust God?” Probably the better question is, “What am I trusting Him for?” Am I trusting Him to keep me, my family and my loved ones safe and immune from all sickness and harm? Consciously, no, but I think if we were all honest deep down, that is our expectation. Did God promise us that? I don’t think so, but He did promise us that He would never leave us or forsake us. (Deut 31:6) God can see the whole picture.

Isaiah 55:8-9 “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the LORD. “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.”

Does knowing these things make it easy to go through losing a child or fighting cancer? An emphatic “NO”! We are human with human emotions and it hurts like crazy and we feel betrayed and let down. God knows that and He can handle it. And He is not going anywhere. He is still there to hold us, love us, and help us through.

So the question I am asking myself now is, “Will I trust God even when bad things happen?” With all my being I want to say yes, but I know that it isn’t that easy. But praise the Lord He loves us unconditionally and takes us just as we are.

Lord, My prayer for my friends and family who are grieving right now is that you will rebuild their trust in You and their peace. You enable us to trust You to start with, it isn’t from ourselves. So I ask you to enable them once again to trust in you. Heal their broken hearts and comfort them in the way only You can. Give them a peace that passes all understanding. Thank you Jesus. In Your name we pray, Amen

Isaiah 26:3 says, “You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you.”

This is a song, with the words following, that has ministered to my sister-in-law through the trial of losing her son. She says it makes sense, and I agree.

Blessings By Laura Story

We pray for blessings
We pray for peace
Comfort for family, protection while we sleep
We pray for healing, for prosperity
We pray for Your mighty hand to ease our suffering
All the while, You hear each spoken need
Yet love is way too much to give us lesser things

'Cause what if your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights are what it takes to know You're near
What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise

We pray for wisdom
Your voice to hear
We cry in anger when we cannot feel You near
We doubt your goodness, we doubt your love
As if every promise from Your Word is not enough
All the while, You hear each desperate plea
As long as we have faith to believe

When friends betray us
When darkness seems to win
We know that pain reminds this heart
That this is not our home

What if my greatest disappointments
Or the aching of this life
Is the revealing of a greater thirst this world can't satisfy
What if trials of this life
The rain, the storms, the hardest nights
Are your mercies in disguise

Alicia Update

WARNING: I decided that if I am going to blog more often, I need to just let myself talk with my fingers and not worry about spending alot of time editing and keeping it short, etc. This means that I can be a little long winded because I can type fast. Sorry about that but hopefully you still find it interesting. Thanks for reading, or at least scanning. :-)

We arrived back from Guatemala City around lunch time today, a half day later than planned, but we are home safely. Alicia didn't like the car seat too much on the way there. She has probably only ridden in a car about 3 times before this and the last time was 4 months ago, so she is not used to being confined. She did finally settle down and was fascinated by the things flying by outside her window. She disliked the doctor checking her out even more. But after we got done there, we went out for spaghetti dinner and boy did she enjoy that. We then went and checked into the Bed and Breakfast where we stayed and she went to bed at 7:30 pm and didn't wake up until 6 am. What an angel! :-) She knows we need our sleep!

The view from our balcony at the Bed and Breakfast we stayed at.

The doctor diagnosed Alicia with Cerebral Palsy, the type that affects one side of the body. He said that she will be able to walk but it may take her until 4 years old to do so. Alicia is also speech delayed but the doctor doesn't think that is related to the Cerebral Palsy in any way. We are going to wait a few more months before we start to look into causes for that. In the meantime, we will be praying hard for her to start walking and talking! Our hope is that some day we will wonder why we were ever worried about her walking and talking because we would love for her to slow down and to stop talking from time to time. :-)

The Doctor also requested that an MRI be done just to check things out. We had that done at 1:00 pm on Friday. Alicia had to be sedated because there is no way a 16 month old is going to lay still for an MRI. Boy, did that bring back memories of when Ryan was 5 years old and needed an MRI done. You'd think it is no big deal since they are put out, but it is the "putting out" that isn't fun. And don't forget the fasting before. She had to eat breakfast by 7am and couldn't have anything to eat until afterwards. And I forgot what it is like to be in an exam room trying to entertain a 1 year old while waiting for the Doctor to come and put the IV in. It was exhausting and Alicia isn't even as mobile as most 1 year olds! But we got the test accomplished and left there around 2:30.

I stayed with Alicia for the exam while Norman went and did our errands so that we could leave town as soon as we were done and get back to the Home at a decent time. Well, the "plan" was to make one "quick" stop at a hardware store to pick up cabinet and drawer handles that I needed to be involved in picking out and then head out of town. Well, that "quick" stop ended up in two stops and lots of traffic, taking 2 hours! Plus we had a little girl with wild hair (they took out her pony tail holder during the MRI and didn't give it back and I didn't have another one), who was still a little loopy from the anesthesia, so looked like she was drunk. And with her hair sticking up like a fountain without a pony tail holder, it really helped the part. :-) I am sure people were wondering what this old gringo couple was doing with a loopy, wild hair little girl. :-)

Alicia waking up from anesthesia.

So at 4:30 pm we FINALLY left Guatemala City. This is when we decided to look at our options. Our biggest concern is the last 22 miles on the windy dirt road through the mountains that takes about a little over an hour right now during dry season. We would be on that road in the dark around 9:00 at night and there is no cell phone reception in the mountains. If anything went wrong mechanically or otherwise, we would be stuck for the night and feel like sitting ducks. Not an inviting scenario. We recently met a missionary who lives in Chichicastenango, an hour and 45 min from San Andres, who had told us that if we ever needed a place to stay we were welcome to stay at their house. So we were at that point where we are thinking, "Did he mean it? We haven't met his wife, will she be in agreement? If it is incredibly inconvenient, will they tell us?" Well, we decided to take the risk and call. They were very gracious and welcomed us with open arms. They are a young couple who have a 9 month old little boy of their own. So Norman and I and our "baby" went to their house to stay. They showed us great hospitality and a good night sleep after a couple of long days. We now have wonderful new friends and are greatly blessed.

This morning we got up and took a tour of the ministry where they serve and then headed back to San Andres and arrived just in time for lunch. Alicia was quickly scooped out of my arms by one of the 12 year olds and given her lunch, and I got to give my lunch my undivided attention for the first time in a couple days. One thing that I learned on this trip is that I am NOT good mom material anymore, assuming I ever was. I am ready for the Grandma stage. Whenever Alicia cried or wanted something, my reaction was oh just give it to her. Let's just go for peace. :-) Definitely not good mom material. :-) But I sure did enjoy loving on Alicia and she did so good! She did much better in the car seat on the way back and slept most of the way! Thanks for the prayers!

Alicia lounging in her car seat.

We would appreciate your continued prayers for Alicia. Please pray that she will keep developing and be able to walk and use her right arm without any physical problems. Also that she will start talking soon. Thanks so much!

Baby Alicia

This is Baby Alicia. She came to live at the home at 1 day old. She was abandoned by her parents and will grow up at the home. She is such a blessing and we are so thrilled to have her. She is now 16 months old. When Alicia was pretty young we noticed that she wouldn't put any weight on her legs like most babies do when you try to stand them up. Shortly after that we noticed that she hardly used her right arm and right leg. We also noticed that her right hand was always clenched hard into a fist. At 7 months old we took her to see a Neuro-surgeon that was here from the States to do some surgeries. He felt that there was something neurological going on and that we should take her for a neurological workup. In November we took her to a Pediatrician so that we could get a referral. We have finally been able to get an appointment with a recommended Neurologist in Guatemala City for Thursday.

Two days ago Alicia turned 16 months old. Alicia does support weight on her legs now and will take steps with help. She isn't crawling yet, but can scoot on her bottom pretty fast to get wherever she wants to go. She is a happy, smiling baby who grins at everyone who walks by. She is also real good at letting her needs be known. Alicia can jabber up a storm and is good at getting her opinion across. She has quite the expressions and makes us all laugh daily. She is deeply loved by all the staff and the kids here at the home. We are so blessed by her and are thankful that the Lord brought her here to us.

So Thursday morning Norman and I will be leaving for the 5 hour trip to Guatemala City with a 1 year old in tow. The appointment is at 3:30 pm so it will be too late to drive back the same day, plus if there are any tests needed we will most likely have to do them the next day as well. So we will be staying the night and hopefully traveling back on Friday. Its been a long time since we've traveled with a baby. Should be an adventure.

Please pray that the Doctor will be able to tell what is going on with Alicia and that she will be able to fully develop physically and mentally. Thank you so much!

Matters of the Heart

One of the first times I came to visit Hogar de Vida on a short term mission team, I remember Tim Stromstad, founding missionary of the home, saying that working with kids can really mess you up. And still to this day I am reminded of how true that is. Kids have a way of getting into our hearts and taking a part of it and never giving it back.

I know this is sad to be thinking about this so far ahead, but I have already been wondering how I am ever going to leave for a month the end of November when we go back to the states for the holidays. I can't wait to go back and I greatly miss my biological kids and family, but on the flip side I am leaving children that I pour my life into every day. When we left 2 years ago for our first short furlough, we had only actually been here 7 months. It was hard to leave but it didn't leave a hole in my heart. This time I am pretty sure it will. But, alas, I will return, and even more than that, God is faithful and will take care of the kids while I am gone and help us both not to miss each other too much.

Now onto another matter of the heart. A little over a month ago, around 9:00 at night, the local police came and brought two sisters, ages 9 and 11. Their mom and dad had divorced. Dad moved away offering no help, so mom went to Guatemala City to find work, leaving her two girls to fend for themselves. The 11 year old had been working full time making tortillas and cleaning. A neighbor became aware of this situation and reported the family. Thus the reason they came to live with us during the time it took to get a court hearing and make a ruling on their future living situation. The possibilities being: live with Dad, live with Mom, stay living at the home. This past Wednesday they went to court with their mom and dad. The mom had found a new job in the village where they live and Dad agreed to help with child support. It was agreed that the 11 year old wouldn't work any more and they would both go to school. So the judge ruled that the girls would go back and live with their mom with these changes taken into consideration.

We are all very happy for these girls and we hope and pray that mom and dad really do carry through with the promised changes. Though we are happy, there is a little sadness as well. These girls were here for a month. We cared for them and nurtured them. We saw the 9 year old grow attached to the adults, giving and receiving lots of hugs, and become confident in her surroundings. We saw the 11 year old gradually loosen up and not work so hard, even play at times. And most importantly we told them about Jesus. We know that this time the Lord gave us to care for them will not be wasted. He has promised that His word will not return void. We pray that as they return to live with their mom, they will remember that Jesus loves them and will never leave or forsake them.

So Tim was right, working with kids messes you up. Part of our hearts went with those 2 little girls. So what is the alternative? Play it safe and not invest in these kids lives. Protect my heart so that it never hurts? Its an option, but in exchange I will be giving up the rewards that come from loving a child. The joy that comes from caring for a child and seeing them start to smile and enjoy life. The unconditional love that comes from a child in return. I will be giving up the hugs and morning greetings. The satisfaction of knowing that I might have had an eternal impact even in the life of one child! No I don't want to give that up, not even so that my heart is safe. Because in reality, God didn't make us that way. He made us to love and in loving and being loved, foremost by Jesus and then pouring this out to others, we are fulfilled. So I encourage you today, take a risk and love someone. It is well worth it!

Got Milk?

It's actually ice-cream. The other day Norman heard the ice cream truck going by and quickly asked "Dad" (Sebastian) if he could buy ice cream for every one even though it was real close to supper time. Dad said yes, and we got to create a memory and spoil the kids a bit. So Norman hailed down the ice cream truck and had him pull into our compound. We suddenly had our own ice cream stand and all the kids lined up to get their own personal ice cream cone. What a fun sight to see. Baby Alicia enjoyed hers right along with the rest of them. You might think buying ice cream for 36 people would break the bank, but no it came to 36 Quetzales which is equal to about $4.80. Nothing like ice cream on a hot summer day!

We're still here!

Okay, it's official. I have done a terrible job of keeping up on my blog. I think about it alot and get wonderful stories in my mind, but some how those great stories never actually get entered into my blog. I remember when my kids were little and not in school yet and I would have all these things I wanted to do but some how never got to them. Something else always took away my time. Well, now I find myself surrounded by 5 toddlers plus up to 25 older kids at any given time. I thought I was busy and had a lot of distractions with 2 kids. I had no idea. I'm not using this as an excuse, just sharing what I am trying to adjust to.

In May we will have been living at the Home of Life for 2 years, you'd think I would be adjusted by now, but I am finding that I am just now feeling more comfortable with my surroundings and more accepted into the "fold". I want to give you an example of why I feel that way, but first I need to give you some background (this may be review for some). Sebastian and Oralia are the directors and live on campus full time with 4 boys of their own. They are the "parents" of the 27 other children that live here on campus. Lorena is 20 years old and grew up in the home. She still lives here at the home and is now working here full time during the week and going to college on Saturdays. Plus we have two more full-time staff members who work during the day, six days a week. My job is to be support to the workers when needed and to perform administrative duties such as Children Sponsorships, coordinating teams, some financial reporting, etc. Right now one of the daily workers is on vacation and Wednesdays is mine and Norman and Lorena's day off. Yesterday Oralia and Amilcar, the Legal Representative of the home, needed to go to Quiche (an hour away) for a court hearing for two girls temporarily placed in our care. They needed Norman to drive them. With Oralia gone that left Lita, the worker all by herself, an impossible situation. Oralia offered to have Lorena not take her day off, but Norman and I offered to postpone ours by a day since Norman couldn't take his anyway. So that would leave Lita and me. So now here is the amazing part. I asked Oralia if she thought the two of us could do it so that Lorena could still get her day off. And she said YES! There was a time not too long ago when they wouldn't have thought that I could handle that. For some reason they thought I had a domestic handicap or something, I don't know. So for them to have confidence in me to truly be a help was a huge step! And for this I am very grateful. We are getting there! And the good thing was that I really did know what to do to be of help. But I have to say I was exhausted by the end of the day! Two people feeding and caring for 30 plus people is a huge job. Boy was I glad for the day off today!

Me making or "attempting" to make tortillas. Lorena and Lita literally flew out of view when the camera came out. I wasn't really working all alone. :-)

Part of my problem with blogging is that I make it too hard. So you may get more blogs with me just babbling about what is on my mind like what is above. Hope its not too boring. Thanks so much for sticking with me and for checking to see if I put in any up dates. Hopefully you won't have to wait so long the next time! Who knows, maybe I'll get Norman to do one every once in awhile to give me a break!

God bless and remember that God is always faithful to complete that which He has started. Even if it means getting nationals to let you help. :-)